My little sister is starting her school-journey on Saturday. Whoah, how crazy is that? Seriously? I was looking my pictures back from ice-age a few weeks ago and I have to say that it feels as though she was just born a few days ago... And now she is going to school. Its just that we are going to buy her school-supplies today and I just cant comprehend the fact that she is a little-big girl already. :) And it makes me feel just a tiny-wee bit old. Im 25???!!!?? We redecorated our whole apartment yesterday. Changed all the rooms, switched a few and she got her own room finally. Girly, pink stuff all over mixed with green and purple and colors she loves. And I got all my stuff into my room. I have a hate-love relationship with living home. I love that I have the most loving family ever, that they care for me and they wont throw me out when I have no place to go to. But I also dislike the fact that I dont have my own home. I have been thinking about it in so many ways, of what I could do about it, but as for now Im here. God knows my heart and why is it the way it is. So judges, stop judging. And come see my life through my point of view.
I really cant do anything I feel forced to do. I cant take a job that stops me from doing the things I love. I love travelling and somehow it makes me walk on water. With no money God always has provided. Yes I lived a safe life in Wales, knowing exactly how big my income was and how much food I could afford etc. Its not so safe-easy-peasy anymore but I haven't lost my faith. And I will not. But I am saying its not so easy for me. I am dreaming of my own home, my own family... I want a baby so bad it aches in me. But it takes two to tango, right? And I guess Im safe with my Father, coz He has put these dreams in me. SO yes. Trusting Him and continuing my journey!
"When you´re at rest, you stop trying. You just wait, you watch, you listen and you prepare to do whatever it is God tells you to do!" Graham Cooke
No comments:
Post a Comment