19.3.10
Mul on...
...kriis.
Ma laulan liiga kõvasti ja mitte üldse nii hästi. Ja siis mul ongi kriis. See ei ole ju hea, kui nii on. Mingi tähelepanuvajadus? Või lihtsalt harjumus...
Ma laulan liiga kõvasti ja mitte üldse nii hästi. Ja siis mul ongi kriis. See ei ole ju hea, kui nii on. Mingi tähelepanuvajadus? Või lihtsalt harjumus...
13.3.10
Im in love...
Coz He is in love with me. The Creator of all the Universe. And there is NOONE who can convince me otherwise with all the theology in this wicked and fallen world. Maybe I cant always say something when people start to question ab my faith... But I realized one thing today. The creator of this beautiful world is my creator as well and He loves the way I laugh, the way I walk, the way I smile, the way I talk and even the way my body is built, duuuh, of course, coz I am made by Him. He has said in His word that I am fearfully and wonderfully made... Doesnt that say already everything? No further questions... No doupts. He has started to talk to me about my life, about the way He created me... That I was no mistake, no outsideofmarriageborn (even though it is like that by outside standards). That He had planned me and wanted me. whoah, I have "known" it all my life, but believed it? Nope. But I do now. I know He has never forsaken or abandon me coz He loves every bit of me. Every cell in my body has been put together by Him, the Father of all the Fathers and Mothers. I guess I dont have to make any sense right now. Well, I dont really care. IF being a mess helps me to get closer to Him, then I might wanna do it. And I think that I want Him to write me life story. Every aspect of this life. Im sure its not going to happen by snapping my fingers or rolling my eyes and sitting on a seat waiting... But really giving. Giving a bit by bit to Him, the LOVE.
whoooah, and love... HE IS LOVE, do u get it? If He is love then He also wants to take care of my love life, He wants to write it. AND u bet He is gonna, coz it is wonderful. If He is love then He should know all about love... and oooh when people get it one day, the world will be a place where little 12 year old girl dont get preagnant by 14 year old boy... and 20 year old girl wont be heartbroken by tens and tens of relationships she has had in the past... and 25 years old boy wont be looking for another girl to have sex with but someone to give his heart to... or even better, GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would love to be the one.. ooo actually I can say it with pride, I am pure sexually. and IM proud of it... but more then that Im thankful to God for that. I can say one day to the man Im getting married with that I did it, I waited for you to ask my hand, to pursue my heart and say: Im ready to give myself to you! And he can take my hand, put a ring on my finger and take me to the althar. Is it a stupid fairy-tale? NOPE. I doupt it. It is my beautiful fairy-tale, but in real life. I know storms will come and surely Im not a saint. :D Haha, Nothing like Jesus. But Jesus had times of struggle and pain and hurt. He was a man of God. And Im gonna be a woman of God, o no, I already am but I have just lost it in the middle of storms and worldy thinking. crazy. I was once called crazy-cherry... now I know why... I think it has a twist on it... You can look on it and say... crazy, lunatic, stupid.. But I can say, crazy enough to dare to say to the world: Im different. I am tired of living a half-christian half-world way of life. T.I.R.E.D. Do u hear me? Tired? Are u not tired? I sure am... I am tired of always wanting everybody´s approval when I actually need Gods opinion and... Im tired of being the girl to everyone that is flirty and ... whatever. I want to live a life to my daddy. the daddy that loves His little girl enough to write HER story for her and only her. Thats the story I desire to have. Tired of this world. The bible says Im in this world but not from this world....
I cant stop. :D Something is going on inside of me... it bubbles up and doesnt want to end. It started a month ago and... is continuing.
stop cherry and breathe... its a new start.
whoooah, and love... HE IS LOVE, do u get it? If He is love then He also wants to take care of my love life, He wants to write it. AND u bet He is gonna, coz it is wonderful. If He is love then He should know all about love... and oooh when people get it one day, the world will be a place where little 12 year old girl dont get preagnant by 14 year old boy... and 20 year old girl wont be heartbroken by tens and tens of relationships she has had in the past... and 25 years old boy wont be looking for another girl to have sex with but someone to give his heart to... or even better, GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would love to be the one.. ooo actually I can say it with pride, I am pure sexually. and IM proud of it... but more then that Im thankful to God for that. I can say one day to the man Im getting married with that I did it, I waited for you to ask my hand, to pursue my heart and say: Im ready to give myself to you! And he can take my hand, put a ring on my finger and take me to the althar. Is it a stupid fairy-tale? NOPE. I doupt it. It is my beautiful fairy-tale, but in real life. I know storms will come and surely Im not a saint. :D Haha, Nothing like Jesus. But Jesus had times of struggle and pain and hurt. He was a man of God. And Im gonna be a woman of God, o no, I already am but I have just lost it in the middle of storms and worldy thinking. crazy. I was once called crazy-cherry... now I know why... I think it has a twist on it... You can look on it and say... crazy, lunatic, stupid.. But I can say, crazy enough to dare to say to the world: Im different. I am tired of living a half-christian half-world way of life. T.I.R.E.D. Do u hear me? Tired? Are u not tired? I sure am... I am tired of always wanting everybody´s approval when I actually need Gods opinion and... Im tired of being the girl to everyone that is flirty and ... whatever. I want to live a life to my daddy. the daddy that loves His little girl enough to write HER story for her and only her. Thats the story I desire to have. Tired of this world. The bible says Im in this world but not from this world....
I cant stop. :D Something is going on inside of me... it bubbles up and doesnt want to end. It started a month ago and... is continuing.
stop cherry and breathe... its a new start.
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