Its very early. Ive been awake for quite some time. Its definitely the new pillow that just doesnt like me. I feel sorry for the pillow coz Im actually extremely likable! ;)But thats not the reason for this blog-entry. The reason is yesterday´s worship-time. I was invited to go to Tartu to lead worship in an event that has such a huge purpose and meaning (you can read more about it here-->http://www.24liikumine.ee/)... Anyway I said yes and then invited Margus to back me up coz I had to be on stage for 2 hours and Im not able to lead worship and play guitar and think of a thousand details at the same time. So I knew Im gonna be comfortable with him. At the same time everything inside of me screamed: "Do not go there, who are you to do it, why are you doing this, why are you singing, what the heck are you even thinking of going there, you are not worthy enough, you have messed up bad, you get angry so easily, you sing bad, you worship bad, you are nothing!" And suddenly I knew I had to go. So yesterday morning started off bad, not gonna go into details but I was just so mad inside, I was like what the heck is going on. But I repented, I gave the burden away and let God deal with it. We hit the road and finally in Tartu, realized we are actually gonna do it.
2 hours went by so fast. It was beautiful. It was precious. It was so much and yet so simple. I gave my heart and yet again God came and took over. I know it coz later when I tried to think back all I knew was that God was with me. I just knew it. Im so thankful yet again. And all the people who heard the message through Pildiraadio, well, Im just thankful. I know that God did something y.day, He definitely broke through and changed something in the atmosphere and brought freedom and healing. The comments I heard later touched my heart and led me into being even more thankful. I use that word a lot in this entry but thats how I feel. I know there wasnt thousands of people listening but those who did were blessed. I was blessed. Men how do I describe how I feel right now? I cant coz its overwhelming! :)
1 comment:
I watched it through the internet and was very blessed by your worship. Though, in America, it was 5-7 AM.
MANY times the devil is messing with us and trying to aggrevate us right before we minister. So,dont take it personally, that you had hard time that morning...It happens.
I felt many times that I cannot go and minister,(tranlsate or lead worship) because i was so mad at something etc.
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